It rained very , very gloriously in New Delhi this morning. The sky line looks a pearly salmon pinkish grey from my office window, now in the evening. There is a luminescence in the sky which is truly lovely. It seems like it will rain again soon.
I am listening to this very beautiful song by Vishal Bharadwaj, lyrics by Gulzar saheb.
‘Bekaran’ is an Urdu word which means limitless , without shores. I fell in love with the word when I understood its meaning.
The song begins with the lines “ik baar to yun hoga, thoda sa sukoon hoga,Na dil mein kasak hogi, na sar pe junoon hoga”
Translation :Someday, it will be so – I’ll find my peace
There will be neither this longing in my heart, nor this madness in my head.
“Bekaraan hain bekaraan,
Aankhein band keeje na
Doobne lage hain hum,
Saans lene deeje na”
Translation: Will you please close your deep, enormous eyes; for I am drowning in them? Allow me to breathe at least…
I am so reminded of Pablo Neruda : “How could one not have loved her great still eyes”
“Ek zara chehra udhar keeje, inaayat hogi
Aapko dekh ke, badi der se, meri saans ruki hai”
Translation: Do me a favor and turn your face the other way, for your beauty has taken my breath away. And if I keep looking at you, I’ll surely lose my breath.
“Ek zara dekhiye to
Aapke paaon tale
Kuchh to atka hai kahin
Waqt se kahiye chale”
Translation:Take a look, there’s something beneath your feet. Oh, it is time ! Its not moving. Would you give it the permission to move? Because it stops when you stop.
“Udti-udti si nazar
Mujhko chhoo jaaye agar
Ek tasleem ko har baar meri aankh jhuki hai”
Translation: Every time your gaze touches me even fleetingly, I lower my gaze in salutation.
“Aankh kuchh laal si hai
Raat jaage to nahin
Raat jab bijli gayi
Darr ke bhaage to nahin”
Translation:Did you stay awake last night ? For your eyes are a little blood shot. I hope the power cut last night didn’t scare you.
“Kya laga honth tale
Jaise koi chot chale
Jaane kya soch ke is baar meri aankh jhuki hai”
Translation: What is that bruise under your lips ? I don’t know what thoughts cross my mind as I look at it and lower my gaze.
“Aankhein teri bekaraan
Aasmaan hi aasmaan”
Translation: Your infinite, limitless eyes. Like the sky!
So, I will sign off here. But there is a longing in my heart. I do not want peace. That madness dances in my head….as I wait for night to fall.. to hear his voice. Perhaps, he will say ‘Lilah” ? 🙂
PS: Actually, he will not say ‘Lilah’, that damned half breed guy of mine, but ‘Baby’! Or worse! Sometimes it is ‘Bebo” 😀 Ah, well…