Let me make it clear from the start. This is not an amateur review of the movie ”Heropanti” (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heropanti ). I would not even want to attempt a review of the movie, which was grossly stupid and eminently forgettable. To make matters worse, I watched the movie in a terrible theater. PVR Anupam, Saket. I was enraged from the time I walked in. The dumb ( euphemism for cretin) private “security girl” refused to let me take in a Cadbury Silk Bar into the building. This is because the sales of the in-house eateries would suffer.Absolutely pathetic idea, I must say.I always cringe when I have to shell out a ridiculous amount of money for popcorn and Pepsi.It doesn’t seem to bother anybody else in the theater though ? Anyways, I ate the entire Cadbury bar ( its that jumbo one ), rather than hand it over to the security.I was deeply suspicious about the way they were eying it. Naturally, I felt pretty sick.The seats in the theater were lumpy,uncomfortable,packed like sardines in a tin. The crowd was a mix of Chaddha/Mehrotra/Arora etc Uncles & Auunties, desi Paris Hiltons with their boy friends ,angrezi-fied Rakhee Sawants with their boyfriends and an old hippie ( me). I sat between a 50-ish lone Sardar ji with a gigantic tub of popcorn and a 20-ish something couple where the guy’s eyes were glued to his girlfriend’s impossibly large bosom rather than the screen. The Sardar ji proceeded to guffaw at all the corny jokes and one-liners in the film. The “”mammarized” guy went into battle strategy to grab the you-know-what ( He failed , by the way).
Right, back to why I am writing this post.Its about the actors ( ?) in the movie.
I shall begin with the ones who are not worth mentioning but played central characters in the movie.
1.Prakash Raj aka Choudhary: Totally stereotyped now. His trademark is his red eyes ( one eye is a little bigger, I think its the left eye) and some loud scary music when he is introduced to the audience.He has replaced Amrish Puri as the ubiquitous Bollywood villain in many guises( typically big unscrupulous businessman, psychopathic politician, cruel father etc ).
2.Kriti Sanon aka Dimpy: Ho -hum. Just another anorexic, pretty face.Go away!
Now to a great actor in a cameo role ( for just say 7 mts).
Sunil Grover (”Guthi”, in Comedy Nights with Kapil, fame). Does a fantastic job!An actor who reminds me of Jim Carey. Such effortless acting.
Alright, now to the actor who played a central character in the film and worth mentioning.
Tiger Shroff aka Babloo: The son of yesteryear’s super-star Jackie Shroff.
I had a few months’ crush on Jackie when his film ‘Hero ‘ released in 1983.His rakish good looks, bad boy with a heart of gold image , playing the flute etc in the film had me weak kneed.Also, he made wearing a bandana look cool in Bollywood.Plus torn jeans and leather jacket.The female lead actor in this film, Meenakshi Sheshadri,I detested and still do.My sister says that’s a Freudian kinda hate ( because of my Jackie-O state of mind then),but she has now faded into oblivion( I am smiling.Evil smile)
Well, I predict that Tiger Shroff is going to make it real big in Bollywood, possibly carving out an action plus romantic niche for himself.A face which has both tenderness and strength. Not the usual chocolate boy good looks, thankfully. He has trained fantastically to have a fantastic body.Its both lean and chiseled out muscles. Not the gross pumped up muscles of John Abraham. But he needs a better stylist surely. His mother, Ayesha Dutt, I remember was quite a stylish woman. Lots of panache. She should pay more attention to this , I feel.I believe she runs an entertainment company with Jackie Shroff ?Better clothes and make -up, especially is urgently required for Tiger.
I shall find many detractors for my praises for Tiger Shroff, I know. But strangely, I kept thinking of Kirk and Michael Douglas, when it came to our Bollywood father and son actor duo.
Further, I had always liked Danny Denzongpa.He is recognized as a successful villain ( Ooops…actor in a negative role. *Rude Bah*) in Bollywood. But man, he was so hot, he should have been a hero in the films as against Jeetendra with his white shirt,white trousers, white banyan, white undies, white shoes etc.Tiger Shroff has that hotness reminiscent of Danny, I feel.
Well, good luck Tiger Shroff 🙂
The music in the film was puke inducing. So I shall sign off with the hit flute notes from ”Hero”, which also figures prominently in ”Heropanti” http://youtu.be/Hj0ndxWJOVU.
the accidental sufi 